would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
