woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
