Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
There r osticjed everywhere
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize