quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
he wants to bone in the snuggie
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
