buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
