So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
