i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
