Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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