shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
