My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
