You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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