Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize