just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
