don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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