I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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