when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
