well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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