I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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