This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
