It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
