I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
