I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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