The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
