I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
MIDGETS
????
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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