ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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