mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
