Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
