Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
