We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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