she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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