your parents love me but you hate me
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
