My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
