I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
You are a genius and a whore.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize