Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Also, beer. Big fan.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
