Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
