So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
