Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
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