Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
