so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize