He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
