Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
