good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
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