And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
there is puke in my bra ... again
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
