This girl is more easily done than said...
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Randomize
