this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
