hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.�
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
