I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
