he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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