Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
