I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
